The Personal Side of Bias, Prejudice, and Oppression

 What memory do you have of an incident when you experienced bias, prejudice, and/or oppression, or witnessed someone else as the target of bias, prejudice, and/or oppression? Keep in mind that one can encounter such incidents in real contexts, including online environments, as well as in fictional ones, such as movies, books, television shows, and the like.

The prejudices and biases are inevitable in the society but how we are able to deconstruct it and build resilience is what matters most. For those in the dominant Culture they enjoy privileges and that comes with added power and before long power takes precedence over others’ freedom to feel and belong. A time I have felt oppressed, made invisible was in May 2005 when I drove from Texas going to Baton Rouge for a conference.  My Iranian friend and I decided to stop and buy some sandwich in a little Texas town of Vidor. We went into a restaurant with some white folks there, we greeted and no one answered. It was weird and when we moved up to the counter we asked to be served but the guy scornfully looked at us and my friend asked again and the guy just stood and gave us this horrific look. When we turned around to see if the other men had noticed the sales guy’s attitude, it was evident that we were in the wrong place because the countenances on the men’s faces was enough to make us understand that we were worth nothing and for us to vamoose. With the bizarre behavior I listened to my guts instinct and I told me friend to head for the door. We understood later that most people in this town were not happy they were black people existing in the world.  They overtly showed their racist attitudes to anyone they deemed should not be existing on planet earth except they were white. I have never felt shocked, oppressed, frightened, and unsafe than I did on this May afternoon 2005.We drove and could not believe what we had just experienced. That look from those white men still haunts me sometimes when I think about it or drive around similar small towns in the United States. We definitely felt invisible and blamed for the color of our skin.  

In what way(s) did the specific bias, prejudice and/or oppression in that incident diminish equity?

The incident absolutely diminishes equity because we were not regarded as equals because of the color of our skin. When we shared with others during the conference we were told the town was notorious for its racism as if that was right. That was overt internalized privilege (Derman-Spark& Edwards, 2010) .The men felt they had the powers, privilege to be white, were in control of their society, felt lucky to be Americans and viewed us as intruders. If we had seen a sign saying “not for people of color”, we may not have gone in to get the shock of our life. Sometimes I wonder, what would have happened if we had decided to speak out to let them know how insensitive they were and how narrow minded, they viewed and understood global world.  We were hungry and could not be served and no one even bothered to intervene. Here we were two immigrants believing in equality and liberty in the United States to be explicitly shown that we were maybe fourth class citizens.

What feelings did this incident bring up for you?

I felt like an outcast, dejected, loss of self and perplexed. I could not imagine why another human being would treat me like trash. In my culture the highest form of disrespect is to talk to someone and the person ignores you or does not respond. I felt resentment, shame, belittled, and felt I should have cursed them out. But again the situation was so frightening to me that there was no time for me to think. I guess I was so taken aback to have experienced what I had read in books, seen on TVs about segregation that was happening right before my eyes. It was racism at its highest point. The ism was overt, direct and spelled out through their actions confirming the adage that “actions speak louder than words”. It took me a very long time to dare to go eat in any restaurant and I can honestly say I have eaten from restaurants about ten times since 2008; and the few times I go out to eat, I just go to a Chinese “All you can eat” buffet. I have left those feelings now behind me because I know who I am and I was never born to be subdued or subjugated by anyone.

What and/or who would have to change in order to turn this incident into an opportunity for greater equity?

 In this situation, It is hard for me to say who has to change because the resentment for the other color seems to have been deep rooted in these men’s hearts. These individuals did this intentionally and proudly because they truly believe that some groups are less worthy or deserving than others (Derman-Spark& Edwards, 2010), which is disheartening. The people in that city need to learn about accepting others from different ethnic backgrounds and become humane in their behavior. They need to be educated that men are born equal and have the same rights to eat from any restaurant and to be treated fairly. They need someone to show them that it is the same blood that flows in each one of us whether black, white or brown.  I wish I had the opportunity to get the same men on that day, take them out of their town to another continent and let them be refused to be served food; so they could emotionally feel what it means to be demeaned, debased, and humiliated. Nonetheless, I hope one day these white men would emulate the examples of other civilized white men and unravel their internalized privilege and become more humane; change is a journey and hopefully the feeling of superiority would come to an end someday.

References

Derman-Sparks, L., & Edwards, J. O. (2010). Anti-bias education for young children and

    ourselves.  Washington, DC: National Association for the Education of Young Children

    (NAEYC).